48 Weeks to Go

August 1, 2009
I watched the Tour de France this year, as I have for the past several years, and as usual I was inspired by the efforts made by the riders. In fact, I have been so inspired, I have decided to begin training for my very own, metaphorical, Tour de France.

I have never put as much effort, either physical, mental, or emotional into anything as the riders in le Tour do. I watch and am amazed.

My life is a mess. I have no job. I am unorganized. I have a torn meniscus in my right knee and my left knee doesn't feel so great. My house is a mess. My car is filled with stuff from my former office, a folding lounge chair, two paintings and a framed print of dogs, two unassembled bookcases, books, 250 bottle caps, and a variety toys from fast food meals from children -- don't judge me, the toys are cute. People seem annoyed with me quite often. This is either all their fault (they don't understand me) or I am overly sensitive. Oh yes, I am depressed. And sometimes I have anxiety. Then there is that pesky anger issue I have from time to time. Oh yes, also the hoarding issue. Like I said, my life is a mess.

On the upside, I am not a heroin addict. Nor do i participate in blood doping. That should count for something.

With those stellar accomplishments, or lack of destructive habits, I am entering a training program for my very own metaphorical Tour de France. My first step is to hire the appropriate staff.